- In person. Do not leave it to Facebook or a text or an email. Even though it may be hard for you to observe my pain (or my attempts to suppress my pain for you), I will appreciate that you cared enough to seek me out and tell me.
- One-on-one. If you don't do this, you might see me running from the room in tears after you make the announcement to the entire group. Please don't humiliate me any more than I already am.
- With a window. Tell me at the end of our time together so that I can hold it together for a few minutes, say goodbye, and then find a quiet place to cry.
- Early. Don't wait until everyone else knows and I feel like I'm the last one to find out because you didn't have the guts to tell me. Don't let me find out through the grapevine or by overhearing your conversation with someone else. I'm already constantly suspicious of the bracelets you're wearing, any minor pain or illness you mention, prenatal vitamins on the counter, and comments from your kids. Infertiles have the best pregnancy radars.
- Unapologetically. Don't be sorry that you're pregnant. I'm not sorry you are! I'm happy for you! I'm just sad that I still am not.
- Succinctly. Don't tell me the story about when you decided to start trying, how easy/hard it was, your feelings when you found out you were expecting, etc.
- Compassionately. If you're reading this, you care about me. Thank you. Share your love with me when you tell me, because I'm going to need it.
Tuesday, August 19, 2014
How to Announce Your Pregnancy to an Infertile Friend or Family Member
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
I want to give this post a big thumbs up. I feel like so much of this is applicable to me.
ReplyDeleteTwo of my favorite women are dealing with this. Thank you for being forgiving of those who didn't/don't know these suggestions.
ReplyDeleteRachel, this is excellent! Everyone should read this. Send it on to the publishers! We should get together soon. Would love to catch up.
ReplyDelete